Men Seeking Calm.

15. Contempt

In this episode, Greg Martin from WalkTheMountain.com explores contempt—one of the most damaging forces in relationships.
More than just anger issues or anger outbursts, contempt expresses superiority through sarcasm, mockery, and put-downs like “You’re such a loser” or “You can’t do anything right.” It’s not just criticism—it’s humiliation.
Contempt often masks deeper pain, unresolved depression as anger, or ongoing resentment, and is the strongest predictor of divorce. Unlike typical anger problems, contempt erodes connection, self-esteem, and emotional safety.
To shift away from it, Greg offers some thoughts that counter anger control strategies like empathy, mutual respect, and choosing kindness over dominance. 
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14. Defensiveness

Defensiveness is another communication choice that degrades Our connection with our partner.
Defensiveness is refusing responsibility for our actions:
by making
excuses,
blaming, or
denying.
We feel overwhelmed by critical feedback. We go into defence mode.
Rather than hearing the other person’s concern, defensiveness deflects or reverses blame,
This makes it harder to resolve issues.
It is a natural inclination to defend, particularly when we are blind-sided by some heavy, critical feedback.
Greg Martin from WalkTheMountain.com
Take Care.
 

13. Criticism.

This episode describes CRITICISM and how it impacts our connection with our partner.
… it frays at our connection with our partner.
Our connection with our partner is one of life’s greatest assets, and so if we do something damaging to this connection, it’s a big problem.
… I am going to discuss positive options for when we feel the need to raise a problem with our partners.
Welcome to the MEN SEEKING CALM podcast.
I invite you to Start the Change Journey and to take a walk with me.
My name is Greg Martin from WalkTheMountain.com
 

12. Reaction Mode is for the Lonely.

Welcome to MEN SEEKING CALM.
I invite you to Start the Change Journey and to take a walk with me.
We cover anger management, male issues and men’s business.
My name is Greg Martin from www.WalkTheMountain.com
 
In this episode I explain why Reaction-Mode is for the Lonely.
 
If we can work on our Reaction-Mode … we can get to Calm, then Happiness is possible and gettable.
 
These are the take-a-ways:
1 I explained reaction mode and …
2 ... How this is a rapid-chemistry event.
3 Reaction is a millisecond choice, but still a choice.
4 Our capacity for thinking is reduced when we are in reaction mode.
5 Occasional reaction-mode is normal when overwhelming events occur in life.
6 It’s exhausting to be the Guy in habitual reaction mode.
7 Reaction-Mode damages relationships.
8 In Reaction-Mode you lose control of the destination, you lose control where you will end up after the interaction
9 People move away from you when you are in Reaction-Mode ... that’s why Reaction-Mode guys end up lonely
10 Responding is the opposite to Reaction. Buy yourself time to think, time to consider your best safest choice moving forward. You will protect your precious connections with people around you.

11. The Man Bubble Principle.

Today it’s Man Bubble time.
greg martin here from WalkTheMountain.com where …
We walk together and with other men motivated to take a journey to CALM.
Imagine if you will, that you are inside of a big bubble.
 
The life lesson is that inside this bubble is what you totally control in life.
Behold!!!!
Your Empire of Control inside the Bubble.
Outside the bubble – influence is as good as it gets.
Influence is negotiated or not negotiated and there resides the friction.
The No Control OUTSIDE THE BUBBLE idea allows us an interesting Freedom.
The Freedom is that we HAVE SELF-PROTECTIVE OPTIONS once we realise this.
When you think you are a victim of someone else’s grand plan that is good for them but not for you, feeling powerless is an ugly state-of-mind to be in.
Agency means to be able to take some control on your life and to make decisions that steer it in a way that gives you some satisfaction.
Agency means you are the driver of your life.
This happens in the Man Bubble.
Subscribe to the Men Seeking Calm membership at
www.WalkTheMountain.com
 

10. The Happy Trap and Calm Baselines.

In this episode I posit that Targeting Happiness in life … is a mistake.
We need to find our way to a Calm Baseline first … in order to get to happiness.
I propose that a more useful target is to Seek Calm.
This podcast is about getting you to a Calm Baseline.
And now you know why I selected Men Seeking Calm as the title of the podcast.
Seeking Happiness has many traps which are discussed.
Calm Baseline features include ...
Peace of mind.
A sense of balance.
I feel that in my life there isn’t an overwhelming threat that I can’t handle.
I have enough mutually supportive relationships that keeps my mind in good shape and
I feel that I am living a life of purpose.
Change and deep learning happens from Experiential Learning by interacting with me or a group of other like-minded men which is the motivation to have a membership.
I hope to see you in the membership.
You can convert this podcast as a passive listening experience, to a guy-talking-to-another-guy about men’s business.

9. Stop Trying to Fix Things, Shutup and Listen.

Domestic violence for men is also described as intimate partner violence and family violence.
In this episode I discuss our first relationship skill for this podcast.
I discuss empathy to our partners, active listening and our conditioning to fix things and how this can get in the way of our relationship. 

8. Uncalm - The Money Tactic.

Supporting men to move from their domestic violence, otherwise known as intimate partner violence and family violence.
We identify what is going on, and provide knowledge and skills to learn how to do beautiful realtionships.
Today we discuss a coercive tactic over an intimate partner which is called the Money Tactic.

7. Uncalm - The Shepherding Tactic.

Today we discuss a coercive tactic over an intimate partner which is called the Shepherding Tactic.
This episode is about supporting men to move from their domestic violence, otherwise known as intimate partner violence or family violence.
WalkTheMountain.com
greg martin
 

6. Uncalm - Emotional Abuse.

Uncalm - Emotional Abuse ... discusses how we use emotional abuse and how it springs from an intention to gain control over our world.
This harms us and our partners.
We need to move from Anger Dysregulation to Calm.
Anger needs to be managed or it will rebound upon us.
WalkTheMountain.com - greg martin