Men Seeking Calm.

19. Negative Filtering.

In this Men Seeking Calm episode, we explore Negative Filtering — the cognitive trap where men obsess over one critical comment or tense moment, ignoring the many things going right in their relationship.
Whether it’s a forgotten bin or a frustrated sigh, this faulty thinking filters out gratitude, affection, and shared joy, leaving men feeling like constant failures.
Greg shares 10 examples of how this plays out and how it silently feeds resentment, shame, and emotional withdrawal.
The fix? Clean your mental lens. Notice what also went well. Reframe the story
When men start to see the full picture, connection and self-worth begin to return. For more grounded guidance, visit Walk-The-Mountain.com and subscribe to the free newsletter.

18. Overgeneralisation.

In this episode of the Men Seeking Calm podcast, explores Overgeneralization — a type of faulty thinking where one bad moment is exaggerated into a total truth.
It’s the mental habit of thinking “She snapped at me — she always does,” or “We argued — our relationship must be falling apart.”
Greg explains how this distorted thinking turns single events into sweeping judgments, disconnecting men from growth, intimacy, and reality.
Rooted in old trauma or fear, overgeneralization can lead men to label themselves or their partners unfairly, turning everyday conflict into emotional catastrophes.
The antidote? Challenge the “always” and “never,” reframe thoughts, and see the grey areas where love and nuance live. With warmth and humour, Greg reminds listeners that relationships are like weather — not every storm means it’s over.
For more grounded tools and support, visit Walk-The-Mountain.com and subscribe to the free newsletter.

17. All or Nothing Thinking.

In this episode of the Men Seeking Calm podcast, Greg Martin explores the trap of All-or-Nothing Thinking — a rigid, black-and-white mindset where every mistake feels like total failure and every disagreement signals doom.
In intimate relationships, this thinking shows up as harsh self-judgment and polarizing assumptions like “If I can’t fix this, I’m useless,” or “She’s upset — our relationship must be over.”
Greg breaks down 10 vivid examples and highlights how this faulty thinking creates shame, disconnection, and emotional shutdown.
But there’s hope — the antidote is finding the middle ground. Through humour and real talk, Greg invites men to drop the drama, embrace emotional complexity, and replace perfectionism with presence.
It’s okay to be imperfect. You’re not a villain or a hero — just a bloke figuring it out. For more insights on anger, relationships, and emotional resilience,
visit WalkTheMountain.com and subscribe to the free newsletter.

16. Frozen in Conflict.

In this episode of the Men Seeking Calm podcast, Greg Martin explores “Frozen in Conflict” — a shutdown response many men have when facing tough conversations.
Whether it’s criticism, shame, or unresolved anger issues, this reaction can look like silence, withdrawal, or emotional disconnection. Often rooted in emotional flooding, depression as anger, or fear of escalation, this leads to unresolved anger problems and broken connection.
For many men and fathers, this can compound anger outbursts, hurt relationships, and leave partners feeling abandoned.
This episode offers a compassionate roadmap to deal with conflict instead of avoiding it — one monkey off your back at a time.
Subscribe to the free Newsletter at WalkTheMountain.com

15. Contempt

In this episode, Greg Martin from WalkTheMountain.com explores contempt—one of the most damaging forces in relationships.
More than just anger issues or anger outbursts, contempt expresses superiority through sarcasm, mockery, and put-downs like “You’re such a loser” or “You can’t do anything right.” It’s not just criticism—it’s humiliation.
Contempt often masks deeper pain, unresolved depression as anger, or ongoing resentment, and is the strongest predictor of divorce. Unlike typical anger problems, contempt erodes connection, self-esteem, and emotional safety.
To shift away from it, Greg offers some thoughts that counter anger control strategies like empathy, mutual respect, and choosing kindness over dominance. 
Subscribe to the free Newsletter at WalkTheMountain.com

14. Defensiveness

Defensiveness is another communication choice that degrades Our connection with our partner.
Defensiveness is refusing responsibility for our actions:
by making
excuses,
blaming, or
denying.
We feel overwhelmed by critical feedback. We go into defence mode.
Rather than hearing the other person’s concern, defensiveness deflects or reverses blame,
This makes it harder to resolve issues.
It is a natural inclination to defend, particularly when we are blind-sided by some heavy, critical feedback.
Greg Martin from WalkTheMountain.com
Take Care.
 

13. Criticism.

This episode describes CRITICISM and how it impacts our connection with our partner.
… it frays at our connection with our partner.
Our connection with our partner is one of life’s greatest assets, and so if we do something damaging to this connection, it’s a big problem.
… I am going to discuss positive options for when we feel the need to raise a problem with our partners.
Welcome to the MEN SEEKING CALM podcast.
I invite you to Start the Change Journey and to take a walk with me.
My name is Greg Martin from WalkTheMountain.com
 

12. Reaction Mode is for the Lonely.

Welcome to MEN SEEKING CALM.
I invite you to Start the Change Journey and to take a walk with me.
We cover anger management, male issues and men’s business.
My name is Greg Martin from www.WalkTheMountain.com
 
In this episode I explain why Reaction-Mode is for the Lonely.
 
If we can work on our Reaction-Mode … we can get to Calm, then Happiness is possible and gettable.
 
These are the take-a-ways:
1 I explained reaction mode and …
2 ... How this is a rapid-chemistry event.
3 Reaction is a millisecond choice, but still a choice.
4 Our capacity for thinking is reduced when we are in reaction mode.
5 Occasional reaction-mode is normal when overwhelming events occur in life.
6 It’s exhausting to be the Guy in habitual reaction mode.
7 Reaction-Mode damages relationships.
8 In Reaction-Mode you lose control of the destination, you lose control where you will end up after the interaction
9 People move away from you when you are in Reaction-Mode ... that’s why Reaction-Mode guys end up lonely
10 Responding is the opposite to Reaction. Buy yourself time to think, time to consider your best safest choice moving forward. You will protect your precious connections with people around you.

11. The Man Bubble Principle.

Today it’s Man Bubble time.
greg martin here from WalkTheMountain.com where …
We walk together and with other men motivated to take a journey to CALM.
Imagine if you will, that you are inside of a big bubble.
 
The life lesson is that inside this bubble is what you totally control in life.
Behold!!!!
Your Empire of Control inside the Bubble.
Outside the bubble – influence is as good as it gets.
Influence is negotiated or not negotiated and there resides the friction.
The No Control OUTSIDE THE BUBBLE idea allows us an interesting Freedom.
The Freedom is that we HAVE SELF-PROTECTIVE OPTIONS once we realise this.
When you think you are a victim of someone else’s grand plan that is good for them but not for you, feeling powerless is an ugly state-of-mind to be in.
Agency means to be able to take some control on your life and to make decisions that steer it in a way that gives you some satisfaction.
Agency means you are the driver of your life.
This happens in the Man Bubble.
Subscribe to the Men Seeking Calm membership at
www.WalkTheMountain.com
 

10. The Happy Trap and Calm Baselines.

In this episode I posit that Targeting Happiness in life … is a mistake.
We need to find our way to a Calm Baseline first … in order to get to happiness.
I propose that a more useful target is to Seek Calm.
This podcast is about getting you to a Calm Baseline.
And now you know why I selected Men Seeking Calm as the title of the podcast.
Seeking Happiness has many traps which are discussed.
Calm Baseline features include ...
Peace of mind.
A sense of balance.
I feel that in my life there isn’t an overwhelming threat that I can’t handle.
I have enough mutually supportive relationships that keeps my mind in good shape and
I feel that I am living a life of purpose.
Change and deep learning happens from Experiential Learning by interacting with me or a group of other like-minded men which is the motivation to have a membership.
I hope to see you in the membership.
You can convert this podcast as a passive listening experience, to a guy-talking-to-another-guy about men’s business.